Psychologist Yulia Vatutina told how to raise a child's self-esteem

Increasing a child's self-esteem is an important parental task. There are several psychological tips for this.

Psychologist Yulia Vatutina told how to raise a child’s self-esteem.

Your attitude towards the child

First, you need to start with yourself. The reason for a child's dissatisfaction with himself may be hidden in inadequate, often excessive demands made on him by his parents. The demands on the child should:

1. Be clear and specific. The child must understand what exactly is required of him.
2. Be positive. Instead of saying "don't do this" or "you can't", it's better to say what you can do instead.
3. Show understanding and support. The child should feel that the parents are on his side and want only the best for him.
4. Appropriate for the age and individual characteristics of the child.

Setting reasonable expectations for your child is a process that requires patience, understanding, and consistency. Ultimately, it will help your child succeed and develop without damaging their self-esteem.

Praise

Secondly, you need to know how to praise a child correctly. Praise plays an important role in education, but in order for it to be effective, you need to take into account several principles.

1. Identify specific achievements. It's better not to say "you're great," but to specifically indicate what exactly the child is being praised for. For example, "you did a good job on your drawing" or "you completed your task."
2. Point to effort, not outcome. It's important to show your child that their efforts matter, even if the outcome isn't perfect. For example, you might say, "You worked hard on that task" or "I see how hard you're trying."
3. Be sincere. Praise should not be overdone or arrogant. It is better to calmly explain to the child what exactly his merits are.
4. Don't exaggerate. Praise should be commensurate with the achievement, otherwise "inflation" of praise may occur and the child will not take it seriously. And next time, it will not be possible to increase his self-esteem with the help of praise.
5. Do not compare your child with other children. This can cause a negative reaction in the child and create inappropriate competition.

In general, praise should be specific, sincere, and encourage him to develop and improve his abilities.

Environment

Third, pay attention to the child's environment. Often the source of low self-esteem is his classmates or friends. It is important to teach the child that the opinions of other people, including peers, can matter, but they should not completely determine what the child thinks and feels.

Here are some simple ideas that can help explain to your child that the opinions of their peers are not a reason to be dissatisfied with themselves.

1. Teach him to respect his own thoughts and feelings. The child must understand that he himself knows best what he likes and that his own thoughts and feelings are of decisive importance.
2. Tell the child that every person is unique. No one can know how the child feels at the moment, what goals and dreams he has, except for him. Therefore, it is necessary to explain to him that only he decides what he needs to achieve in life and what not.
3. Explain that it is important to choose the right friends. If a child is surrounded by positive and supportive friends who respect his opinions and feelings, he will feel comfortable and confident. But if the child's environment consists of people who constantly criticize and judge, then the child will have a hard time.
4. Teach him to pay attention to negative comments. It is important for the child to understand that all people have the right to their own opinion, and sometimes these opinions may not coincide.
5. Help your child express his thoughts correctly. You can encourage him to talk about what is bothering him, teach him to respond to criticism, and explain how to clearly express his feelings.

Respect

And fourthly, the child must be respected. He feels very subtly the real parental attitude towards him, and this affects his self-esteem. Respect consists of the following components.

1. Ability to listen to a child. It is important to understand that a child is an individual who has the right to his or her own opinion and worldview. It is not necessary to accept his or her point of view, but it is necessary to make sure that he or she is aware of his or her right to it.
2. Interest in the child's interests and hobbies. It is important to be genuinely interested in his activities, ask questions and even participate in them.
3. Evaluation of specific actions, not the individual as a whole.
4. Recognition of individuality. It is important to remember that each child has his or her own unique set of talents, interests, and tastes. And parents should respect them, even if they are not close to them.
5. Empowering the child to make decisions independently.

Increasing a child's self-esteem is an important aspect of their emotional, mental and social development. These simple steps will help create conditions for the child to adequately assess himself.