Correct self-assessment helps you set goals that are adequate to your capabilities and achieve them successfully.
Psychologist and psychosomatologist Elena Katsyuba explains how to understand that self-esteem is normal and what to do if there is something wrong with it.
And in case of failure, don’t give up and learn something useful from the situation so as not to repeat mistakes in the future.
Types of self-assessments
The most common is low self-esteem. This is an underestimation of one's own qualities and abilities. A person cannot take what the world offers him, because he believes that he does not deserve it.
He is not comfortable and convenient in interacting with others, so he cannot move forward effectively.
Overestimation of self-esteem also complicates a person's life. Its danger is that a person's ideas about himself are overestimated and do not coincide with reality. This leads to the fact that he takes on more than he is actually capable of, fails, but high self-esteem does not allow him to admit it.
This also leads to ineffective interaction with the outside world.
Where is the golden mean?
The question arises: where is the golden mean? I asked my clients who have a healthy opinion of themselves what the concept of "adequate self-esteem" means to them. They say that it is about self-love. But not about the kind where a person, elbowing everyone aside, achieves a place in the sun because he deserves better.
To love yourself in their understanding is to do sports, buy quality things, have a good rest and eat well, that is, to do things that improve the quality of life. And for them, these actions are as much a norm of life as, for example, taking a shower in the morning.
Thus, with normal self-esteem, a person understands that it is normal when you feel good. A person in such a state calmly contacts the world - objects to it if he does not agree, accepts its conditions if he considers them acceptable for himself.
A person with low self-esteem can more easily admit that there is a problem. He can gradually narrow down the source of the problem and work through it on his own or with a specialist.
A person with high self-esteem will learn and accept this fact only if he gets to a psychologist or someone close to him whom he trusts tells him about it.
