"If you think you can, you're right. If you think you can't, you're also right."
Business coach, founder of the International Academy of Business Coaching 2WIN Katerina Akman, revealed the meaning of Henry Ford's quote and named ways to combat self-doubt.
Confidence is the most important component of achieving goals and realizing potential. It is the inner feeling of yourself as a person who can.
The word confidence comes from the Latin "fidere" - to trust. So to be confident means to trust yourself and not be afraid to show individuality.
In a state of confidence, we feel our value as a person, we believe that we are worthy, capable, and we act more boldly.
When we are not confident in ourselves, we tend to think that we cannot do something or are not capable of doing something. In this way, we slow down our development and progress.
Innovator and successful businessman Henry Ford subtly noted that confident and insecure people are equally right in their beliefs. Both find evidence in life of the subjective feeling of "I can / I can't".
Where does uncertainty come from?
Of course, childhood has a big influence on the development of our confidence. If we grew up in a supportive and loving family, it’s one story. If we were often criticized by parents or teachers, then it’s a completely different story.
The positive thing is that confidence is developed throughout life. Accordingly, this quality can be worked on.
Sometimes the reason for insecurity is related to our personal characteristics, not only psychological but also physiological. One person has a strong nervous system, he easily copes with stressful situations, another may be more labile and anxious.
How to deal with uncertainty
If we proceed from the fact that confidence is our subjective idea of ourselves, then we can change this idea.
1. Track negative attitudes
Listen to your inner voice. It is important to notice phrases that speak of your negative attitude towards yourself and the feeling that you cannot do something. It is more effective to do this with a coach or psychologist.
For example, an employee wants to achieve higher results in the company and grow in his career. He is advised to contact the manager and talk about a new position, but the person has the following beliefs: "Asking is wrong", "If I ask the manager, I will be obliged to him", "The boss himself should notice my successes".
Phrases like these literally hold us back from taking effective steps and preventing us from achieving our desired goals.
2. Come up with an alternative to negative attitudes
We change the belief “Asking is bad” to the opposite – “Asking is good”. We answer the question: “Why can the new attitude be useful to us?” For example, if I ask my manager for a raise, he will pay attention to my desire to develop in the company and, perhaps, will meet me halfway, we will discuss a career trajectory, my income may increase, and I will feel more confident and successful.
You can make a list of positive I-attitudes in different areas of life. Start your day with new formulations that will take you from a feeling of uncertainty to a state of "I can!", "I am worthy!", "I will succeed!"
3. Testing the new reality
Start doing things in your life that you haven't done before, based on alternative attitudes and a positive sense of yourself. For example, try asking another person for a favor from the state that asking for help is good.
A positive response will give you confidence. Even if you don't succeed the first time, be persistent. It is important to get confirmation of your new attitudes.
4. Expanding our competencies
The more you know how to do a job, the more confident you feel. Perhaps you lack some competencies and skills. Try not to avoid this fact. Additional training or new experience will give you confidence in the most natural way.
5. Fake it till you make it
Insecurity is very clearly manifested in the body. The person seems to shrink. Closed postures, crossed arms or legs are typical for him. He may lower his eyes or look away, speak incoherently, fidget in his chair or fidget.
If you tend to behave like this, try to show yourself differently. Imagine that you have already learned to behave confidently with the interlocutor.
Even if you feel like slouching, try to straighten your back during the conversation, speak clearly and take your time. In gaining confidence, you can go from external behavior to internal feelings. There is a wonderful expression - Fake it till you make it. This method works great.
In conclusion about the pyramid of results. Our results depend on actions. Actions determine beliefs. Beliefs depend on knowledge.
So surround yourself with people who will teach you the right knowledge. This will help you form the right beliefs that will positively influence your confidence, actions, and desired outcome.
