When a person feels jealousy from a partner, at first he feels that he even likes it.
Then it starts to get boring. Eventually, excessive jealousy can lead to the risk that your partner might actually cheat. If they are constantly being accused of this, at least it wasn't in vain.
How jealousy manifests itself:
- checking your phone, email, all messengers;
- constant monitoring of your location: where you are, who you are with, etc.;
- prohibiting the partner from going to corporate events, meetings with friends;
- "searching" personal belongings to check for suspicious items;
- painful reaction if the partner simply talks even about work with the opposite sex.
At the same time, the one who is jealous torments himself and throws tantrums at the other person for no reason. As a result, both get tired of such a relationship.
How to deal with this destructive feeling
1. Discuss boundaries with your partner: what norms are acceptable in your relationship and what are not.
For example, a man can go to a bar to drink beer with friends, but he cannot go to a nightclub until the morning. You agree on this in advance.
2. In a fit of jealousy, do not sort things out. First, calm down, take a breath, look at the situation with a cool mind: do you really have grounds for jealousy or are these your fantasies. And only then act if there is something to find fault with.
3. Work on your self-confidence. When you are jealous, you are afraid of losing your partner, hold on to him. Be sure that he will not find a better wife. He will feel your value and remain faithful.
4. Check if you are transferring fear from another person's behavior to your partner. For example, your first husband cheated on you, and you are afraid that it will happen again. Your dad cheated on your mom, and you are afraid of ending up in the same situation.
Look at things realistically: has this person ever given you real reasons to be jealous? Or are these your fears?
5. Calm your egoism and sense of ownership. Your partner is not your thing. A person has the right to personal space, communication and travel without you. Each partner can live their own life, while maintaining fidelity and community with their partner. The union of two whole people.
6. If you can't cope and jealousy is poisoning your life, consult a psychologist. He will help you find the underlying causes of jealousy and cope with them.
