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Psychologist Anna Zhustal told how to find friends
16.02.2023 21:03
Updated: 14.04.2023 03:10
Friendships between people do not happen by design, and you cannot force another person to be your friend because you decide that he or she is the best candidate for the role.
Anna Zhustal, psychologist and author of the self-development book “Inevitable Happiness,” told us how to find friends.
But you can create conditions for yourself in which your social circle will expand not through artificial acquaintances, but because you are on the same wavelength with these people.
Be in your element
Listen to yourself - what do you like to do and what kind of people do you usually feel comfortable with. It is important that your interest in this area is genuine.
Find communities that bring together people with the same passions as you – running, hiking, knitting, painting, singing, etc.
To begin with, these can be online platforms, for example, publics on social networks, but preferably in your city. You can observe the communication of its participants and understand whether you are comfortable communicating with such people. If so, then you can move on to offline communication.
Most likely, the participants of the same public organize meetings for devirtualization and acquaintances. Or organize thematic events - joint bike rides, hikes and even birthday celebrations or other special occasions.
At such events you have every chance to make friends, some of whom may later become your friends.
How to behave when meeting someone
The best advice is to be yourself and show genuine interest in others. If you play a role, you are likely to push away the people who are most compatible with your personality and attract those who are not.
Being yourself, you won’t have to win anyone over, because the process of interaction will be as natural as possible.
It will be a little more difficult for an introvert, he needs to try a little, show openness and friendliness to establish the first contact. In turn, if you see a closed person, but feel that he may be interesting to you, gently and unobtrusively help him open up and adapt - and, perhaps, you will get the best and most devoted friend.
How to Maintain Relationships
Friendship, like family relationships, requires constant communication and emotional commitment.
Don't forget to congratulate your friend on his birthday, try to meet more often, support him when troubles happen in his life, and sincerely share joyful events with him.
In the process of communication, it should not be a one-sided game - do not talk only about yourself and your problems, let your friend speak out, without devaluing his experiences, no matter how insignificant they may seem to you.
