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Why a man does not invest in a relationship
26.04.2023 07:45
An old but very true axiom says: "A man makes his contribution to the relationship." This can be very valuable gifts, material assistance, as well as emotions, certain decisions that improve your life together, and even organizing a vacation. Each of the couple makes their contribution to the developing romance in one way or another.
But suddenly the rose-colored glasses are replaced by real vision, and you notice that the game is only one-sided. And for some reason they are not yours! That is, you give a lot of energy and time (and sometimes money) to your partner, and in return he gives you... magical nothing. Why does this happen? There are at least 10 reasons for this, says Pavel Rakov , an expert of the online publication Belnovosti, a psychologist, coach, and creator of the cult training “In fact, I am smart, but I live like a fool.”
1. Not at all in love
Yes, often the representatives of the stronger sex enter into relationships without love. What goals do they pursue? Different. Some require only sex, others - free household services.
Perhaps your chosen one's "clock started ticking" when he looked at his married friends. And sometimes parents demand that their bachelor son have grandchildren and settle down in general.
If there were no feelings for you and there are none, then is it any wonder that there is no contribution? Without a special desire, no person in the world will spend their energy, time and finances on something that does not bring any pleasure in the end.
2. The Miserly Knight
The most common reason, of course, is male greed. He is just a real stingy knight, so you are unlikely to wait for a bouquet from him on a date.
Most likely, you will have a separate account, zero birthday presents, and if you live together, constant reports on the family budget spent and constant begging for money for urgent needs. By the way, stingy partners also do not give enough emotions. No attention and pleasant words, no praise and compliments! With such a representative of the stronger sex, you can forget about it.
3. "Tsar, very nice to meet you!"
Was your partner brought up by parents with the principles of "I'm the best" and "everything is only for me"? Well, you got a real emperor with a real crown on his head, only invisible. Of course, such a person will not invest anything in the relationship.
On the contrary, he expects some gifts from you in the form of an evening at the cinema paid for, organizing his meals at home (at your expense), high-quality service in everyday life, as well as attention. God forbid, you decide to acquire some kind of hobby! Your best hobby is the Tsar. You should be pleased just from his radiant face.
4. The Eternal Waiter
Some men often start relationships, but always look to the side. What if there is a better specimen of a woman there? Such people are always looking for their other half, but for some reason they never find it. And when there is some hypothetical dream lady, then why invest in a real relationship?
Let the romance last unhurriedly, and as soon as She, the Real Lady, appears on the horizon, then all resources will be thrown at her feet. True, each new ideal for such a partner turns out to be “not the one”, and the gentleman again sets out to search, saving his investments for brighter days.
5. Married and very responsible
Not all married men give their mistresses apartments, cars and fur coats. Some are simply very responsible, so they spend their earnings mainly on their family. From you, such people only need fun, ease and attention.
Don't expect reciprocal emotions equal to yours. The mistress will celebrate New Year and other holidays alone. So draw your own conclusions. If the care and attention from your chosen one comes in very measured doses, mainly by phone and on certain days, maybe it's time to check the passport for a stamp? Or find out about his real family.
6. Old trauma
Men who are traumatized by past relationships do not seek to make any investments. Neither material nor emotional. They will test the waters for a very long time, perhaps testing your strength.
Past experience tells such gentlemen that girls are flighty individuals, and therefore there is no need to rush with gifts, help and attention. A woman has two options when meeting such a representative of the stronger sex. Either wait until the partner's heart thaws, or leave. After all, a person who knows about his traumas, but does not work through them, can forever freeze in this state - eternal mistrust of the opposite sex.
7. Follower of the Guru
Pushkin's followers know that ladies must be won over with indifference and intrigue. And many Internet gurus broadcast these principles to the general public.
So, perhaps the partner who doesn't invest anything in the relationship has been lectured on how to manipulate women. Or he has been traumatized and has thus found confirmation that all ladies are scum… You are unlikely to change his mind, and it is not worth it.
In response, you will only hear how selfish and materialistic young ladies have become, and all because they were spoiled by feminists. Any variations on this theme should convince you to stay away from such a person.
8. Career Builder
A man who is building a career very often does not find the strength and time for objective reasons. Work takes up most of his time, so there is practically nothing left for a relationship. Or your partner is a real workaholic who replaces some areas of life with his projects and development of professional skills.
If this situation doesn't bother you, you are absolutely sure that he is not covering up his affairs with the rush job at the office, then you should wait a little. And calmly talk to your chosen one about time for the two of you.
9. Without strength
In the case of professional burnout, age crises and serious illnesses, a person is left without strength. It is unlikely that he can give anything to the relationship if he barely has enough energy for himself. This happens, so you will have to be patient, if, of course, you value your partner. Just be there at such a moment and offer your beloved man your shoulder.
Let him know that he is always welcome at home. The exception to this case is alcoholism, gambling addiction and addiction to illegal substances. Yes, these are the same serious diseases, but your safety and health are more important in this situation.
10. Demanding woman
And be sure to look at yourself. Are you demanding the impossible from your man? What if the game is only going in your favor?
With an unequal exchange of energy, even the most patient person will retreat into the shadows, leaving you alone with their whims. Perhaps it's time to reconsider your views on relationships and start not only taking, but also giving.
