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What 5 Phrases Psychologists Do Not Recommend Telling Your Children: Mistakes Many Parents Make
17.01.2023 21:07
Updated: 13.04.2023 12:16
Many adults, when raising children, transmit models that they themselves saw in childhood.
But just 10-20 years ago, mass psychology and pedagogy were not so developed, as a result of which many mistakes were made.
Therefore, it is worth knowing what phrases you should not say to your child.
What expressions should you avoid?
"You're just like your mother/you're growing up to be a copy of your father"
There is nothing wrong with these phrases if they are said in a positive context: for example, the child draws beautifully, like his mother, or writes excellent poetry, like his father.
If you are trying to insult children by resembling one of their parents, then this is a very dangerous undertaking. The child did not choose his parents, so you cannot blame him for being like one of them. Besides, children love both their mother and father. So you should not focus on the shortcomings.
"How clumsy you are!"
Almost all children can show a certain level of awkwardness, but this goes away with age. Instead of ridiculing a child's clumsiness, it is better to help him become more attentive and careful.
Children need support, not a statement of their shortcomings.
"Who do you love more?"
Some parents want to know that their child loves them more than their spouse. But this is not quite the right position. Children love their mom and dad equally.
Experts do not recommend asking such a question, because searching for an answer to it can lead to serious psychological problems.
"You have to eat it all to the end"
Any child is afraid to hear this phrase. It is important for parents to understand that children eat exactly as much as they need. You can’t force them to eat more food than they want.
Moreover, one should not use blackmail of any kind in this case, otherwise one may face eating disorders in adolescence.
"You're always like this!"
Sometimes parents use this method to get their point across. The child is extremely offended by this approach. Even if children often do something wrong, you shouldn't reproach them for it.
Better help them cope with their shortcomings.
