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Why is it important for parents to know child psychology?
08.01.2023 21:05
Updated: 13.04.2023 08:40
Most often, there are two categories of parents.
Dmitry Raevsky, founder of a network of integrative medicine clinics, a specialist in psychosomatics and therapeutic touch, explained why it is important to know child psychology.
Some invest their soul, strength, and money in their children: they organize quality food, clothing, education, and take them to all sorts of clubs and sections. But the child does not appreciate this, does not respond with obedience, diligence, or interest, as they would like.
Others experience pangs of conscience because they are too busy to fully engage with their child. He uses the minimum of kindergarten and school that the state provides. At a certain stage, difficulties and manifestations of character also arise.
Why does this happen?
It is important to understand child psychology, namely the age-related characteristics of a child. There is a theory that a person develops in seven-year cycles.
This is how the child's physical growth and development goes up to 7 years. During this period, there is no need to develop him intellectually or physically to the maximum. Everything is aimed at the child taking what he needs from the environment.
In addition, during this period, the child's subconscious is closely connected with the subconscious of the mother or the person who spends a lot of time with him, with whom a psychological connection has been established. What does this mean?
A child subtly feels everything that happens to his mother or guardian, all experiences can affect the baby's health. If the mother lives in constant stress, then stress will also become the norm for the child. If the mother's emotional background is calm and even, then the child will grow up in warm, loving conditions.
Here it is very important for parents to understand this relationship, not to suppress the child, but to observe and work on themselves. Hysterics and protests can be both a way of learning about the world around us, our feelings, and a consequence of the relationship between parents, the state of the mother.
The age from 7 to 14 years is the period of active socialization of the child. He learns to be friends, build relationships with others, understand and feel them. And subconsciously, he already separates from his mother. At this age, the child realizes himself as a separate person who feels, experiences emotions, and learns to live through these emotions.
Many children between the ages of 7 and 10 experience a so-called rollback. That is, an unwillingness to break away from their mother. If at 5-6 years old the child was eager to make decisions independently, choose clothes, food, now he shows indecisiveness, wants more affection, attention from his parents.
Here it is important for adults to understand the reasons for such behavior, not to scold, not to shame, but to give the child what he needs. Hugs and love, for example. And then this period of separation will pass as smoothly and harmoniously as possible.
From about 10 years and up, children often try bright colors in clothes, dye their hair. Girls paint their nails, wear shoes with high platforms or heels. They want to become adults as soon as possible. And this should also be understood as a psychological feature of age. Not suppress, not stop, but, if possible, understand and support.
The third stage is the age from 14 to 21. In essence, this is the formation of an adult. But it also affects adolescence, when the child is already completely subconsciously separated from his parents. At the same time, he may feel lost. Depression, rebellion, denial of parents and their experience are common. Here, instructions, punishments, and upbringing no longer work.
During this period, you can only be a friend to your child, who will listen, understand, support, and help if the child asks for help.
It is important to build a trusting relationship with a clear message: "You are my child. Whatever and whenever happens, you can always turn to me, tell me. And I will do everything in my power to support and help."
Knowing all these cycles, the peculiarities of child psychology with age changes, you can prevent many mistakes in advance, build the right relationship with the child and improve existing ones.
