He gave her flowers for no reason. She made him coffee every morning. They seemed like a perfect couple until betrayal came knocking at their door.
How is it that people who truly love each other suddenly betray each other? It turns out that it is not always a matter of a lack of feelings.
Cry for help
Often, betrayal is a cry for help that a person could not express in any other way.
Loyalty is not an innate virtue, but a constant work on choice.
But when unspoken grievances accumulate in a relationship, even the strongest of spirits can snap. For example, one partner ignores the other's needs for years, dismissing them as "whims."
Sooner or later, the one who is not heard will find an ear elsewhere. And this is not an excuse, but a sad pattern.
Paradox
The paradox is that many cheat not because they have fallen out of love. They are not looking for sex or novelty in another person, but for themselves.
The one they were before the relationship: confident, interesting, desirable. If a couple stops seeing each other as individuals, cheating becomes an attempt to regain the lost identity.
Women often cheat because of emotional hunger. For example, a wife who has not been hugged for years, or told "you're beautiful," may give in to someone who notices her fatigue.
This is not an excuse, but an explanation: betrayal is often rooted in unmet basic needs - intimacy, recognition, security.
But there is good news: such a crisis can be overcome if both sides are ready for dialogue.
How to Prevent Cheating
Let's look at a typical scenario: A man after 10 years of marriage feels that he is perceived only as a "breadwinner."
They stopped asking him about his dreams, criticized him for every mistake. A colleague appears at work who listens to his jokes and admires his ideas.
He doesn't plan to leave his family, but a thought is born in his head: "What if I can still be liked?" This is not love for another - it is a desperate search for self-respect.
What to do if you suspect your partner is cheating? Don't rush to conclusions. First, ask yourself: what signals might you have missed?
Were there “zones of silence” in your relationship – topics that could no longer be raised?
If the fact of betrayal is confirmed, do not blame yourself. Even in the most difficult situations, a person has a choice: talk, go to a psychologist, or leave. Cheating is his decision, not your "insufficiency."
But how do you prevent disaster? Start by being honest with yourself. If you find yourself thinking, “I’m bored in this relationship,” don’t ignore it.
Discuss with your partner what can be changed. Perhaps it’s worth introducing new rituals, such as “dates” once a week or joint courses.
The main thing is not to hush up problems until they become an abyss.
