If you have decided to get a divorce, you should not delay the moment when you tell your children about what is happening.
Even if you have very young children growing up in your family, believe me, they see and understand that something is going wrong, but because no one tells them anything, a contradiction arises, and with it stress and loss of strength that they will soon need.
It would also be a mistake not to answer children’s questions – sometimes parents do this with the best of intentions, so as not to hurt the child.
Again, the feeling that something is being hidden from him can create anxiety, nervousness, sleep problems and other unpleasantness in the child.
The certainty that children so badly need is also killed by the different versions of the reasons for the breakup voiced by parents. It only gets worse when mom and dad blame each other for the breakup, make one of them guilty and turn the child against him.
Therefore, the first thing you should do is agree with your spouse about how you will explain what is happening to the younger members of the family.
Once you have reached such an agreement, talk to your children together. Everything should happen in a friendly atmosphere, and your versions should be identical.
However, you should not use some reasons, even if they are true.
- Poor financial support from one of the parents.
- Treason.
- Bad attitude and behavior of one parent towards the other.
- Resentment (whatever it may be caused by) of one parent towards the other.
- Incorrect upbringing on the part of one of the parents.
Instead of referring to the reasons listed, come up with another, neutral one, and voice it at a family meeting.
For reference
Divorce is the official termination (dissolution) of a valid marriage between living spouses.
