Silence is not golden, but passive aggression: why you shouldn’t shut up after a fight
Sometimes a heated argument with a loved one ends in icy silence.
It doesn't matter who you ignore - your partner, your child, your colleague - silence is bad for your relationship.
Family therapist Aparna Sagaram believes that silence puts the ignorer in a position of power, as the other person is forced to wait for him to condescend to communicate with him.
For many, the silent treatment is a natural response to conflict and hurt feelings. Typically, ignoring is used when we want our opponent to repent, show concern, or realize what they are missing.
It's as if we're saying, "I want the person I'm not talking to in my life in a different way. By making my displeasure obvious, I'm trying to get them to change the way they treat me."
But refusing to communicate is not capable of pushing a partner to change their behavior.
Even if the silent treatment feels more comfortable to you in the moment, it absolutely won't work in the long run.
If you have a habit of resolving conflicts with silence, try keeping the pauses short - take a break to cool down and get to a state in which you are able to talk.
