Psychologist Andrey Kashkarov told what will help to improve relationships
Mutual interest in each other and joint actions help to improve relationships in the modern world.
Mutual interest is assumed where there is or was a "spark of feeling", that is, at least mutual attraction. But mutual attraction is also possible on a so-called "secondary basis", when the relationship has faded away and then become relevant again.
In this case, the partners seem to rediscover each other, and it is not too late to do this at any age and under any circumstances - if there is a desire.
One complements the other with what is lacking in his own character or abilities, says psychologist Andrei Kashkarov .
Joint actions are possible in principle at any stage of the relationship - there would be a desire. For example, paying off a loan or mortgage for shared real estate is also joint action. And the most common unifying factor is family relations, raising children.
This is one of the basic needs of a realized woman, and she very zealously searches for a man to be her partner, choosing from many candidates precisely the “child-oriented” one, that is, capable of a stable family life, preferably monogamous.
In a practical sense, there are such techniques for renewing interest in each other in the context of building relationships.
Meetings at the table. In the format of an apartment, a house, outdoors or in a restaurant (cafe). Eating together generally brings people together. But it is especially effective where strangers are not “spying” on the man and woman. That is why privacy is important for gastronomic pleasures, and not only gastronomic ones.
Hence, another accompanying factor predisposing to "relationships" is also important - the atmosphere, in particular the romantic one. At home or indoors, this could be lit candles, an outstandingly laid table, appropriate clothing of the man and woman. In nature, in principle, everything romantic has already been created. Nature itself disposes to reciprocity. You just need to make sure that it is not cold in the conventional winter, and that in the summer you are not "eaten by insects."
The clothes of people who are a couple or who do not resist resuming personal relationships should be attractive and somewhat eye-catching, "open", with a hint of some naked parts of the body. There are many individual characteristics here: someone needs to see an open neck and necessarily a shock of hair on the man's chest, and for someone it is enough to show the tip of a shoe from behind a long ball gown with a train.
This is about external signs. Of course, this list is far from complete. Thus, some couples are excited by mutual interest in a dangerous situation - when they can be caught in an intimate setting or, conversely, when both, like the hypothetical Bonnie Parker and Clyde Barrow, are escaping pursuit.
When mutual interest has emerged or manifested itself, it is necessary to support it with joint plans. At first, you can actualize the process by discussing plans and correctly and carefully clarifying the positions of the parties. But this must be done, otherwise it is difficult to understand the other. In addition, when both in a couple strive for a relationship, the likelihood of compromises in plans increases, and, in fact, the prospect of a relationship becomes very real.
In any case, the process of establishing a relationship always involves at least two interested parties, and one of them must be the first to take the initiative.
