How to Out-Argue Your Husband and Get Your Way: 9 Steps
It doesn't matter how many years you've been living with your husband - 1 year or 20 years. In any case, you've already encountered issues that cause disagreement.
How to learn to save more money, when to start repairs, what car to buy – all these questions cause serious disputes, sometimes turning into serious scandals. How to prevent this?
First of all, you must remember that men and women are absolutely different in nature: the former are rational, and the latter are emotional.
If you want to win an argument with your spouse, you must use reasoning and logic. There should be no hysterics or screaming!
9 Rules of Reasonable Debate
1. It is recommended to avoid a serious conversation if you are both angry, feeling bad, or feeling extremely tired.
Did your conversation start at the most inopportune moment, when your chosen one is angry and irritated? Let him speak out to relieve the tension. He should voice all his demands and complaints (reasonable and unfounded).
Listen patiently to the end and only then speak.
2. After the passions have heated up, try to give your conversation a more pragmatic tone. Address your other half with the words: “Are your words based on facts or guesses?”, “For what reasons are you rejecting my proposal?”
3. Negative assessments of your partner are unacceptable! Refuse them. Do not use phrases like: "You are terribly inattentive", "You are unable to understand the simplest things!" Tell the man how you feel about his words and behavior: "I think you are mistaken", "Your words hurt me", "You are behaving rudely", "I ask you to speak clearly and without haste."
4. Ask your chosen one to express his opinion, relying on specific arguments. After he finishes his speech, clarify: “So, you advise to do this… (repeat his words).
This technique will help you demonstrate to your spouse your readiness to conduct a dialogue. He will be pleased to know that you were able to correctly understand his statement. In addition, nothing will remain from the previous tension between you.
5. Now it's your turn to voice your point of view. Remember: it must be reasoned! Do you dream of buying a new huge TV, but don't know how to push a man to purchase this valuable acquisition? Arm yourself with at least four arguments.
- You will get rid of your old TV, which looks like an old dusty box.
- You will be able to watch movies and TV series in high quality at any time, and even on a big screen.
- You will enjoy every day a palette of rich and bright colors that were not available on outdated equipment.
- You won't have to re-tune the wrong channels every time.
Prepare yourself for the fact that you will have to listen to the objections of your chosen one. To do this, take care of counterarguments that you will use at the most appropriate moment.
6. Is your spouse afraid that this purchase will cost you too much? Make a list before the conversation: it will indicate the amount that the TV will cost you, and the specific sources from which you will allocate funds to pay off the loan. After your convincing counterarguments, your loved one will quickly stop resisting!
7. Try to identify fundamental and non-fundamental positions in the subject of the dispute. If you give in to your husband in small things today, you will not suffer. Tomorrow you can win, thus achieving your main goal.
8. Did your life partner finally admit that you were right? Don't use your victory to your detriment! Don't say things like, "I warned you that this is how it would turn out!" Don't remind him of his mistake every time, it will humiliate his dignity.
As is known, representatives of the stronger sex are proud. In addition, no man will like constant mentions of his mistakes. Do you want your husband to accuse you of inattention or shortsightedness every day?
9. If the truth is on the side of your chosen one, you must admit your defeat. The goal of a family dispute is not victory, but the ability to make the right decision. It should benefit not only both spouses, but also their offspring. Egoism and stubbornness have no place in such important discussions!
