"Boys Don't Act Like That": Why Parents Shouldn't Say This Phrase to Their Son
Not wanting to see the tears of an upset son, many parents remind the child that he is a boy.
And it is for this reason that the baby supposedly has no right to cry.
As a result, many boys listen and learn to control their emotions.
But is this right? At first glance, yes: the child demonstrates “masculine” behavior and continues to do so in adulthood.
On the other hand, the phrase "Boys don't behave like that" can be harmful to the child.
What is the danger of this phrase?
"Don't you dare cry! You're a boy!" - many mothers and fathers often say.
They think that this is how it should be done. But such reminders are a manifestation of stereotypical thinking.
Parents must understand that being male does not mean that a child does not have the right to express emotions.
Of course, there is no need to cry for any reason. But if the situation is really difficult, then the baby should still throw out the accumulated negativity.
Then the child will calm down, begin to feel better and find the strength to solve the problem.
And if a boy constantly restrains his emotions, he may have several problems at once. It is possible that he will become withdrawn, silent, unsociable, and also a person with low self-esteem and a sense of guilt.
It's a different matter if the boy is a crybaby. The child needs to be explained that constant tears and whims are not the most decent behavior. The main thing is for the child to understand: he is being criticized not for behaving "not like a boy", but for being capricious in general.
By the way, you shouldn't scold your son for choosing a "girly" hobby (or your daughter for choosing a "boyish" one). Does your child want to do some handicrafts? There's nothing wrong with that. You shouldn't force a boy to play football or box if he doesn't want to.
