There is no love in feeling sorry for yourself or for anyone else. So if you want to be supportive out of pity, it is best to do nothing at all.
This kind of behavior weakens the other person.
If you try to save someone out of pity, you take on the strong role of the rescuer, while your interlocutor is forced to take the place of the weakling.
When empathy is based on compassion (“I understand that the situation is very unpleasant”), it speaks of a connection with the feelings of the other.
At such moments he feels support and understanding, which undoubtedly gives him strength.
Understanding feelings means being able to accept and respect another person’s emotions. Instead of invalidating their experiences (“don’t cry,” “it’s not scary”), we show empathy and acknowledge the other person’s right to express their emotions (“I understand that you were hurt,” “you have the right to be upset”).
In this way, we show not pity, but support, and give the interlocutor the right to experience his feelings.
When a person is given permission to express his emotions, he begins to take control of his life and finds ways to overcome difficulties.
Conversely, denying emotions can lead to feelings of rejection and lack of belonging to a particular social group.
