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Should I leave a person after cheating?
06.10.2024 07:20
Cheating is a painful turning point in a couple. After it, you can't say, "Let's just forget and live as before." It won't happen anyway.
Cheating will stand as an invisible, strong wall between partners.
It is a mistake to think that there is only one way out of this situation – separation. In fact, there are three. And each of them has its own “list of arguments”. Let’s look at each of them.
Parting
It is a usual and seemingly the most logical way out after finding out the fact of betrayal of a loved one. No one argues, you can leave (or kick out your partner), "patch up" the emotional wounds and start building a new life.
What exactly can serve as a decisive reason for making a decision to break up? This is:
• Education/picture of the world where there should be no cheating on the part of either partner in a relationship.
• Too many accumulated reproaches, claims and grievances. Here, betrayal serves as a logical reason to put an end to it without pangs of conscience.
• There are no options to save the relationship. For example, the partner decided to get a divorce to be with his "beloved person". The arguments of the other half will not be taken into account here at all.
Maintaining Relationships
This option may be accepted by a couple who either love each other very much or do not want to ruin their relationship due to public pressure.
An important condition when making such a decision: both partners must change. Because if both people do not work through this situation, then there will remain resentment, anger and a desire to take revenge on the cheater. And at some far from bright and happy moment, the patience of the "injured party" may end, and it will go for revenge.
It is worth noting that in such a state it will be very problematic to predict even the approximate extent of the revenge.
Especially if it was meticulously and carefully planned over a long period of time.
But if the partners were able to find the moral strength to "step over" the betrayal, to truly forgive each other (the cheater - for the betrayal, and the "injured party" - for the mistakes that provoked the emergence of this situation), then there is a chance that such a relationship will be very strong and trusting. But it is worth noting that few decide on this option. Because it requires a huge amount of mental strength and patience.
Break in relationship
The third option, which can last quite a long time. Everything will depend on the desire/unwillingness of the partners to maintain the relationship.
It is worth noting that many couples choose this method to come to their senses and find an adequate solution in this situation, understand themselves, calm down, and understand how to live on.
But in this decision, there is one very important nuance, which for some reason is forgotten or not taken into account at all.
Its essence is as follows: if a decision is made to break off relations, then you should not move to live with friends/relatives.
Especially if they are negatively disposed towards their other half. It is better to rent a room/apartment and live there for some time.
Why is it best to be alone? It's simple: relatives and friends can convince you to make a decision that is not beneficial for you. And you will regret it for a very long time.
Remember that in such a state you are very vulnerable psychologically. Therefore, it will be very, very easy for even a stranger to convince you of their rightness.
Therefore, it is better to live alone, without advice and moral support from other people. Yes, it is hard. Very hard.
But this will allow you to soberly assess the situation and understand what you want from life in general.
And by the way, this option will deprive you of the opportunity to later shift the blame for the decision made onto other people.
